Teddy Episode
Long before Joaqui was born,his daddy and I fell in love with a teddy bear we saw in Megamall. Not like the usual plush toys, teddy is made of a cloth like that of a baby’s towel, soft to your touch, hypoallergenic, and it was looking back at us as if pleading for us to take it home. Precious, just like the giddy little baby boy in my tummy. We loved it so much that we made sure to pack it along with the other essentials when we went to the hospital on 30th of September, 2004.
After 12 hours of labor, and a few more hours in the operating and recovery room, Teddy was finally introduced to for the first time. We placed it just above his head in the baby cot.
Since that day, Joaqui and Teddy were inseparable. Teddy lost a lot of weight,what with all the hugs he get from the chubby little toddler. It was a struggle to wash teddy because Joaqui cannot function without it. That, i think is an understatement.
Four years later, Teddy got lost. I thought i will never hear the end of it from Joaqui. Im pretty sure somehow he still blames me for forgetting to take that paper bag which has teddy my hard drive in it. I think that was my first major sin.
Three years passed and ever so slowly, he forgot about teddy.
Until last night when I was giving him a bath, we sang a song that reminded him of teddy. It was Sean Kingston’s song, Beautiful Girl. It was the song I sing while making Teddy dance to make him smile and sometimes laugh.
I thought it was going to be a normal conversation until I saw tears welling in his eyes when he asked if the cab driver gave teddy to his child.
It was Joaqui’s first heartbreak and mine as a mother.
I said Teddy is happy with his new friend now and that he should be too. Joaqui asked if teddy still remembers him and that if he is still Teddy’s best friend. I said yes. At this point, he was hugging me tightly and breaking into tears.
I didn’t know how I can make him feel better. I said he can write him a letter and we can tie it to a balloon and let it fly till it reaches teddy. He was worried it wouldn’t reach teddy and that if it does, Teddy wouldn’t be able to read it because he couldn’t read…because he didn’t teach him how.
It is at moments like this when I am reminded that the 7-year old teenager-wannabe is still a baby.
I made him a promise that we will go on a teddy hunt. I said teddy needs a new body but it will still be the same teddy he grew up with and loved dearly.
I know this can be boring and shallow for some but for me, it was a moment that I actually felt like he was that 3-year old baby again who calls mommy for anything and everything. It was another opportunity for me to tuck him in and say it will be okay and make him feel better just by holding his hand.
I love you Joaqui and Yana. There is nothing, and I mean nothing, I wouldn’t do within my powers to protect you and I will never get tired of listening to your stories and coming up with crazy ideas to make you two feel better.
I love you and i always will…I don’t care if, when you’re a grown up already you don’t want to be around mommy too much…know that I will always have my arms wide open when you come running back to me for absolutely anything.
