Dream guy is now a dad.

Yes, you're a daddy now. :)

My dreams with you may be shattered but I am sincerely happy for you.
May your family be filled with love and joy. Congratulations.  :)
Maybe I can meet your son someday.

Always your fan girl.

I suddenly remember my fan girl moments with you.

The days when we used to talk, days when I hear you sing live, days when you smile to me.
I am kilig with the unexpected tweet. Feeling ko nagsmile ka personally.
I regret not going to that Alphaland gig though.
See you soon, Yraz. I miss you. And Kuya Yan, too.

Forgive and Forget

It is never easy. I hope things will be better sooner.

I cried today.

Love Rant

From a happily married man, to a guy who is an expectant daddy, to an adorable boy who seems to be in a relationship and younger than me. Why love has to be soooooo much complicated for me. I am in love at all times but it's been ages, retro, dragon time since I had this bfgf thing called relationship. Deymn. How long is your journey, Mr. Right? Call me maybe.

Nikki's ASAP Statement

This is one of the moments that I wanted to hug Nix real tight.



This birthday prod is indeed a mix of all emotions. I watched this past 6am today, and I found myself in tears. Nikki is a wonderful person who deserves a wonderful life. She is fulfilling her dreams one step at a time and the people around her is very supportive in every step. From being a commercial model, she became a tv personality, a singer, a VJ, and a theater actress.

I am glad that my chinito crush, Chino Lui Pio is one of her closest friend. Myx life is fun life. I wish Nikki to have many more years in Myx. She is an awesome VJ, I know, you know. :)

A big thanks to the theater production who see and believe in Nikki's talent. She didn't fail you, right?! I hope she'll have more plays to perform. Nikki as Elle Woods and Charity and Sonia is remarkable.

Nikki has also turned to be one of the brilliant drama actress. She is open to learn everything about the craft and that is truly a dedication. She has put all the passion and heart to the previous projects and many will be glad to see her again in a drama role. Be ready for Maria Mercedes, Nixters! :)

I'm happy also for Nix because she have real friends in the showbiz industry. A support and love from the people in same industry you work for is way too important. Being in the same business makes them understand how life is, and the ups and downs in it. I'm glad she has friends from behind the camera.

As much as I fangirl a lot, Nikki is a fan of many artists too. Ms. Lea Salonga is one of them and I can feel the giggles and happiness everytime she had an encounter with her. Aaaah, I can relate to her very much. More fan girl moments for you, Nix. Alicia Keys is coming.

The ponytail dance is fun filled. She's very gorgeous in the dance floor. And of course, the singing is undeniably superb.

All the things in the video is just heartwarming, and positive, and inspiring that I have to blog about it. I am very proud of you, Ate!

To the bestest friends ever, Iya Poks and Shaina Dowr, a huge, huge thanks. The true meaning of friendship is what you made us see and feel. I admire how you cheer her up, and stand by her in the toughest time. Happy days are coming your way. :) Celebrate friendship forevah!

I pray that Nikki's dream "to be whole again" will come true. Like what I said to Nikki in one message, "Your laughter and smile is contagious. Be happy everyday! :)"

We met

...in a dream of a common friend.

You are interesting. :)

Happy 26th Ate Nix! :)

There are some days I still cannot believe that I met you

Times that I still wonder if this is true

You are a person I look up to

You are an inspiration as I always tell you.

The happy days with you and the Nixters

Everyday I remember

Friendship I will treasure forever

We are friends, we are sisters.

When you call me engineer

I always smile dear

Thanks for being proud of me

Thanks for encouraging me to be the best that I can be.

You are a kind hearted being

Who deserves the Creator's blessings

I pray that your dreams may come true

Peace and happiness may be with you.

You are admired and loved by many

You are surrounded with amazing friends and family

You are sweet, smart, gorgeous, pretty

I wish you'll have a great birthday, Ate Nikki!

Thank you

I miss you

I love you

Happy Birthday to you! :)

your fan girl forever,

Poem 118: Regal

I like you;

from the day i've heard about you

i cannot stoP thinking of you

i had no idea what you look like

any vision wasn't that cleaR enough.

i read your string of wOrds

way better than the poems i wrote

mine is nonsense like this

Creations you'll never notice.

you draw stRikingly

being with you could be lovely

let's mAke a Story

a real life beauty.

your voice melts me

you sing beauTiful melody

heart beats swIftly

dreams too maNy

i cAn never be the perfecT gal

may nOt even be ideal

but maybe we can be pals
make love that's Right and regal.

Pffffft

You know I cant love you like this.
So please just let my feelings be for now at least until- S

Feelings

There are unhappy days, stressful days, steady days, and joyful days. The past days seem to be combination of all feelings.

1. There are highly respectable professions as commoners would think. Can we at least manage to do the stereotype? Some respect and admiration aren't easy to regain when lost.

2. The magic of surprises are always wonderful. I am the happiest, well at least the second happiest because my friend has a cool guy crush. The sweet participation during the surprise skit, the cake he holds for her, the resemblance on their smiles, the captured photo. Everything just felt positive. I hope it will go far. But he has a girlfriend. 

3. My friend wanted this one guy to for me. She has said all the good things about him and he almost pass to my ideal guy checklist. He is athletic, intelligent, rich, religious, family-oriented, will be getting a degree title sooner and not chinito but a cutie. Let me mention that he is a musician, a singer, composer, and knows how to play musical instruments too and he blogs and he draws beautifully. BUT my friend likes him (although I have her blessing), and he’s still studying, and he’s young, and maybe he won’t like me. I may be his opposite.

4. There is a line between being a girl and being a woman, that I may call being a lady. I’m glad I am enjoying the best of both worlds. My lovely colleagues are too awesome. I’m glad I can talk a lot now, and listen and learn. Everyday is to be thankful for. Life is serious, mature, light, and fun. I’m happy to have my girls around. I’m happy to be back in optimistic mind set.

5. There is a difference between being a boss and a leader. Is it hard to practice common courtesy? I hope you’ll realize. Respect is a big word.

6. They say girls are multitasker. I guess I am guilty, I do it everyday.

7. Some may not adore rain because of its emo feel. I love the positivity on it however. Somehow the idea of walking and dancing under the rain is delightful. Thanks to Taylor Swift for making us realize.

8. I am interested about you. Would you mind telling about your cradle? I like you in stories. Tell me how you procrastinate? J I like your silhouette photos. 

9. And I melt just now. Until this very second. Shet, di yata tayo bagay.

Hummy

There’s so much I wanted to say, there’s too much emotions I wanted to burst out, and there are still stories left unclear. This break up has put all the feelings, rumbles, and questions to mine the past week. 

The main people affected is part of my life. I may not be close enough to them but I am a witness to their love story because I get to know both of them personally, face to face, got to share conversations and laughter. Sometimes I still can’t believe I’ve actually met them. But one thing I have to believe in is the two had to go separate ways. There have been lots off confusions and conclusions to this fuss but who are we to judge. The two were the only ones who can give us the answers but respect for privacy could be the most appropriate to give. Yes they are public figure but whether a celebrity or a regular citizen, we all have reasons to get hurt, cry, and be sad. Could we at least make life fair to them? But it can never be. 

I admire those who understand and I hope those who meddle had at least the reason to care. We all tend to get broken and when we know that people around us care and love us, acceptance and moving on would be easier. 

Our lives weren’t different to them. We get lost, we hurt people, we make decisions we weren’t sure if good. We were left by people we love, we fight for a relationship, we let go. We feel the anger, we go trough in denial stage, we accept, and then we move on. We cling again to destiny, to happy ever after, to dream come true, to true love. After all it’s amazing to love and be loved.

Gotta love August 1

I always look forward to beginnings. Although everyday, we can always do a good start, it's a stereotype that we do plans, goals, or resolutions during transition periods. It's more like I'll get a new hairstyle on August, I'll exercise starting Monday, I'll organize my files on the next quarter, or I'll be a health buff after New Year's Eve. So we welcome the 8th month today and we've been reading and hearing "August, please be good to me" e inaano ka ba ni August. My 1st day with Pareng August is actually a good one!

I woke up late than the usual. I did my morning routine then I left home. Today was one of the days I wish I had wake up early. I had a hard time waiting for the transportation going to work. It took me almost 30 minutes of waiting. During the travel time, I glance at my watch every now and then. The train is also too busy as it used to be. I guess I am late in the office for 5 minutes which is way too far to my usual 2-hour early bird employee.

I do my work errands, updates, paper works, etc. I went to site for a quick house turnover to client. After that, we headed to the mall to grab some lunch with lots of kwento in between . We went back to office and still continued eating, a choco mallow and cheesecake this time for dessert.

Maybe you're wondering what is amazing with that usual day of a regular employee. I'm weirdo at times but not today. The highlight of my day is seeing my crush. (So do you really think I'm weird?) He wasn't just this ordinary guy that i found cute or witty or what, he is actually my ideal guy. There have been blog post and poems and happy writings about him.

All the while I thought I was over him until that very moment...when I thought the feelings were gone, the daydreams were forgotten, and the acceptance had happened, the almost empty love I had goes up, recharged, and full of dreams yet again.

He passes by our cubicle and he glances at me I assume. My heart beats fast, my face blushes, and my smile is endless. My universe has stopped for a while and I stand up to make sure that it was him and to find out where is he going.

All the feelings were reminisced, all the things from the beginning just flashes, and I am back to be the girl who's hopelessly in love with the guy who is unfortunately in a relationship. Just another fail moment in love.

After an hour there was a commotion that happened inside the office which made us into panic mode. When all was buzzing and walking and asking, my world just stops again as I stare the guy of my dreams. He could've been my dream come true only if he wasn't into a commitment. Damn it. Why do guys that I like we're all complicated when paired to me. Guess I'm the looser here. Anyway, I'm just too happy that I finally, after 7 months, I get to see him again. His checkered top, and the boss's bag he's carrying and his more matured face. You seems better now and happier and smarter. My love for you that I thought was almost empty goes overflow and become unlimited again.

Was it destined that we are now under the same boss? I hope to see you more often. Maybe it wasn't love at all. I'm very vocal on wishing to have a guy bestfriend or an older brother. Maybe we can. Can we?

Happy August ahead!