Tuesday, May 13, 2014

Mid(20s)-life Crisis

1. Sometimes I like my job, sometimes I don't. I knew it wasn't the career I wanted. I still cannot figure out where to go, so I'm still here. I wanted to leave soon enough before I get too depressed on wasting my time in chasing dreams. It was an uneasy feeling since Monday. It feels like I want to runaway. 

2. I am ready to have a significant other. But I wanted the ideal boyfriend. But I am a regular girl. And boys wanted an ideal girlfriend. I ain't the one. Ktnxbye. 

3. My spiritual life is struggling. I remember way back in high school when I knew I am closer to God. I was a student catechist before and was able to preach God's word to young ones. I am able to attend a recollection and have confession every year. I hear mass every Sunday, I pray everyday, I got to reflect everyday. I hope I could go back to that routine. I wanted to but I am resorting to excuses like time,energy,and companion. I seriously have to work this out. 

4. I wanted to engage myself on a healthy lifestyle. I'd love to run, exercise, and choose nutritious food diet so I can gain back my fit body. Yet again, time, energy, and companion are my problem. Too much reasons. Nah. 

5. Some of my friends have started their own family. The thoughts of them having a baby sometimes envy me. But no, I don't want to have a child yet. It's just that when I see them post photos of their babies online, it seems that they are having their best life yet. Kids do bring too much happiness. 

6. I'm still mad with my ex boyfriend. I shouldn't have wasted my time for the wrong guy. As of today, I knew I wasn't ready for closure. Maybe because I haven't found the right guy whom I can be proud of compared to the damn exbf. So I'm still the looser here. I wasn't lucky in love I guess. Why do people choose to spend longer time with you when they knew they still have to leave you. Hassle.

And too many little problems in between. I wanted a turning point in my life. I don't know how.



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